Hey Barn,
14/05/2017
Hey Barn,
I was just thinking. Maybe I loved you too soon and too much. Maybe that was a lethal combination. Maybe it was destined to never be a fairy tale but rather a moment to never forget. I'm making you cringe aren't I?
So I've had a fairly good day, a nice shift at work and a decent mood. I'm really tired though and I've got a presentation in the morning, the only issue is that it is a group presentation and the girls haven't sent me their share of the work yet. Basically, I have to stay awake until they're done. I need a shower too, I'm tired and dirty. I wore make up today, again. I did the eye liner thing you used to like. I guess I'll always do a lot of things because of you. Even with out you in my life I want to impress you. It sort of makes me want to be one of those Bimbo Barbie girls you see out in Cleethorpes. You know, the ones I look shit in comparison too? Maybe I'll try that. I think I need to be as 'not me' as possible.
You don't like me.
I don't like me.
Yet, I never change.
You're right, I say the 'old C' is back every month but what I mean by that is, I keep feeling more and more like myself. I haven't struggled to be distant from you as much as I would have previously. I'm getting better with that. I need you less than I did.
Anyway, I'm tired and boring.
So Goodnight, my love.
Yours until the world ceases to exist,
C.
Hey Barn,
I was just thinking. Maybe I loved you too soon and too much. Maybe that was a lethal combination. Maybe it was destined to never be a fairy tale but rather a moment to never forget. I'm making you cringe aren't I?
So I've had a fairly good day, a nice shift at work and a decent mood. I'm really tired though and I've got a presentation in the morning, the only issue is that it is a group presentation and the girls haven't sent me their share of the work yet. Basically, I have to stay awake until they're done. I need a shower too, I'm tired and dirty. I wore make up today, again. I did the eye liner thing you used to like. I guess I'll always do a lot of things because of you. Even with out you in my life I want to impress you. It sort of makes me want to be one of those Bimbo Barbie girls you see out in Cleethorpes. You know, the ones I look shit in comparison too? Maybe I'll try that. I think I need to be as 'not me' as possible.
You don't like me.
I don't like me.
Yet, I never change.
You're right, I say the 'old C' is back every month but what I mean by that is, I keep feeling more and more like myself. I haven't struggled to be distant from you as much as I would have previously. I'm getting better with that. I need you less than I did.
Anyway, I'm tired and boring.
So Goodnight, my love.
Yours until the world ceases to exist,
C.
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